Uncertainty

So the rumers you've heard are true - I did run our Subaru Legacy off the road this past sunday. Liz and I were unhurt, save for a sore back (me) and whiplash (Liz). Our poor car is totaled. Here's what happened.

We're driving along on 490 heading home, very slowly (since it was crappy weather out) when I hit a small patch of black ice just over a bridge. I fishtailed and then we ploughed right into the guard rail, hitting it twice: first with the left nose of the car, then with the back left, implanting the guard rail into the back of our car. We barely missed a flock of cars and one very large truck that nearly hit us.

The guardrail remains unscratched.

Kudos to Kevin, the very kind Biaggi's cook that stopped to help us when we crashed. He drove us to a gas station to call my dad and then to our apartment on his way home. I learned something about helping others on Sunday from Kevin; it just takes stopping your own life a little to make someone else feel safer.

Meanwhile, the car is totaled and there's no real chance of getting it back, though we will have to replace it. The engine took the brunt of the damage, but there are so many issues with the sides of the car that it's just not worth rebuilding. But what we've been facing the past two days has been hard: uncertainty. Worry.

Fear.

I can't tell you how much this threw me for a loop. We were almost home, and then it happened. Totally out of the blue, it was over in a few seconds. I thank God for sparing our lives and even for sparing our bodies any real harm. But the question remains - now what?

We spent two days debating that question, being worried, being afraid of the unknown. We didn't know what to do. I kept telling myself that everything would be ok, that we'd work it out. But it's tough to make yourself believe that when everything feels so hopeless.

It's amazing the tricks the enemy plays with your mind. I definitely had times when I believed that everything would be ok, but there were also definitely times when I totally broke down and began worrying about what would come next. This worries me ... which is sorta ironic, cause I don't want to be worrying at ALL. Biblically you're not supposed to worry.

I guess the key is that if you worry about something, just keep reminding yourself that it's going to work out. It may not work out how you want it to, but it WILL work out. And sometimes it works out better than you could've hoped.

See, we're getting a new car, and the choices are way cool: Hyundai Santa Fe, Pontiac Vibe, and possibly others that we haven't found yet. But I can't wait to see how it pans out - God is good!!

Rejoice!

Merry Christmas everyone!

I hope that amidst all of the great food, the family, the fun, and yes, the presents, that you remember why we do this every year.

"But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from the days of eternity ..." ~Micah 5:2

"The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." ~John 1:14

The ruler of eternity has come, and the Kingdom of God is at hand! This Christmas, may you be blessed to understand the truth in these words - Jesus the Christ has come! Rejoice!

Breakaway

I heard this song on the radio today, and as it turns out, not owning a TV has its disadvantages. I mean, sure, I avoid all the crap that's on (including the news, sometimes), but I missed this one. Kelly Clarkson was apparently on this show called "American Idol" that I never watched. Even I heard about the show, but I never heard the song till today. And somehow it helps to have heard it. I wish I could say that it was from a Christian song that I found some inspiration, but today it was from what appears to be the secular world.

I think this sort of confirms my growing suspician - the secular and the Christian worlds really aren't very different. In fact, the only thing different is that Christians - at least, true Jesus-Followers - claim grace from a God who loves them, and the secular world refuses to have anything to do with Him. But something about this song struck me as wholly inspiring and even something Jesus might approve of. It speaks to those who grew up in tough places. Now, I grew up in a loving home, with wonderful parents and a wonderful sister, but it speaks to me too. It reminds me of those not as fortunate as me, and it reminds me that I have to grow up and move onto the stuff God's got planned for me away from home, away from comfort, away from all that is familiar: "take a risk, take a chance, and break away."

Anyway, the song. Enjoy.

Breakaway, by Kelly Clarkson

Grew up in a small town, and when the rain would fall down,
I'd just stare out my window.
Dreaming of what could be, and if I'd end up happy,
I would pray.

Try hard to reach out, but when I tried to speak out,
Felt like no-one could hear me.
Wanted to belong here, but something felt so wrong here.
So I'd pray, I could break away.

(chorus)
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly,
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky,
And I'll make a wish, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun,
I won't forget all the ones that I love.
I've gotta take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.

Wanna feel the warm breeze, sleep under a palm tree,
Feel the rush of the ocean.
Get onboard a fast train, travel on a jetplane,
Faraway, and break away.

(chorus)

Buildings with a 100 floors,
Swinging around revolving doors,
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me.
But I gotta keep moving on moving on,
Fly away, break away.

(chorus) ...

The music video (and hear it): http://media.bmgonline.com/rcarecords.com/kelly_clarkson/video/breakaway_300.asx