August 24, 2007

"And Now, A Word From Our Sponsor ..."

Ok. So I've studied psychology a bit. Al Quaeda is becoming a nuisence, and nobody seems to know what to do. But I do. Here's what we do:

We pay al quaeda to terrorize.

No? Try this on for size. This experiment has been replicated over and over again in multiple cultures: A bunch of bullies are consistently throwing stuff at a guy's shop. He has tried everything to discourage them, but it only seems to strengthen their resolve, and amuses them endlessly. So one day, he comes up with the idea to pay them to throw stuff at his shop. They're happy, thinking that their luck has never been better. But then a few weeks later, he cuts their pay. They don't like it much, but they keep throwing stuff. A few weeks later he cuts it again. Then again every couple weeks until one day, he stops paying them at all. And suddenly they go away, citing better things to do.

Reverse psychology, I guess. But it works.

What do you think?

3 comments:

Greg said...

That is certainly an interesting idea... but these guys are religiously motivated. Not thinking that's gonna work... :-)

a. annie said...

We have already paid them and armed them to kill us.
The Government accountability office reported that 190,000 AK-47s and pistols could not be accounted for. This is 1/3 of all the weapons sent to Iraq for the Iraqi security forces.
We have spent half a trillion $ and counting. That's not including the money and arms we gave directly to Bin Laden and the Taliban in Afghanistan during their war against the USSR. I think everyone would like to know: how many more billions of dollars and thousands of lives until they go away (as per your story)? I think we all (except Bush apparently) know the answer to this (see Greg's comment.)

Chris said...

Irony?