Family of Four

Caedmon Jace Logan, born 1-29-10 at 4:09am, weighed in at 8 lbs 9 oz. He's got his daddy's height and his momma's pouty lip; the girls are and forever will be going wild because of that. Liz is doing really well after being induced and having a subsequent 25 hours of labor. She's gotten sleep, I have not (but am looking forward to bedtime). Thanks to everyone who was praying for us, God listened; when it seemed that we'd be inducing for two more full days, she suddenly went into active labor and dialated 7cm in the span of an hour. Caedmon was born not too long after, just a few hours - 45 minutes of pushing (very short).

His name is Gaelic; "Caedmon", the warrior, and "Jace", derivative of "Jason", healer. Warrior-healer. Liz calls him CJ. We pray he lives up to his name.

Pictures via Flickr

Culture Shock

Allow me to apologize for the lack of blogging in the recent past. It's been far too long since I've written anything here, but I do have a valid excuse: we moved.

We're now residents of the sprawling suburb of Mitchell, South Dakota. It took us three days, 1500ish miles, $800ish in gasoline (diesel and unleaded), one truck, two minivans, too much fast food, and not enough sleep to get here. We have an apartment for now, hopes to get a house, and I'm working as the worship arts pastor at Mitchell Wesleyan Church. And I can't tell you how weird it's been adjusting to the new culture.

Let me first say that I tend to not be big on "christian culture"; I'm more comfortable in and around a more religiously, politically, and ethnically diverse crowd because as a missionary, that's what I've been used to. The most religiously diverse it gets here are the various denominations, who mostly seem to get along. But it's as if everyone speaks another language here - I hear things like "what a blessing!" and "take a stand!" and "the Lord is good!" on a regular basis.

And they all call me "pastor."

I didn't realize they were even talking to me at first - I thought they were talking to Keith, the Senior Pastor, since he was around often enough when they said it. But it finally dawned on me when they were helping us cart boxes into the apartment and someone called me that directly to my face ... I suddenly realized how many people I'd just ignored for the past hour. It's taken some getting used to, and I can't decide if it'd be a cultural faux pas to insist on being called by my given name.

Also it's very flat out here.

But let me tell you, these are some of the most generous people I've ever met. We've had dinners made for us almost every night since we got here (Liz was especially thrilled), and the leftovers alone will give us another week at least. But on top of that, the - bags - of veggies we've gotten from various people (corn especially, but also peppers, jalepenos, tomatos, etc.) will go well with the full quarter of a cow that someone from the church gave us. That's roughly seventy-five pounds of South Dakota beef, to the uninitiated.

They've been very good to us, and we are very grateful.

We continue to work on getting settled, change our government papers (car plates, mailing address, etc.), organize our stuff out of boxes, and generally learn the area. Rori has been doing well in the new apartment, with so much space, she gets to run around a lot and ends up sleeping longer at naptime. Life is a little crazy right now, but as soon as it starts to get a bit more routine, I'll be sure to start writing again - I do miss it. But thank you so much to all of you who've been praying - God has been very good to us.

We're Moving!

We've been busy: I got a job (w00t!) in South Dakota, and so we've been preparing all our stuff, finding an apartment (still none yet), and making other arrangements. And so naturally we took the opportunity to visit Rhode Island once more before we move into the midwest where the only saltwater is the sweat beading off your brow in the summer heat. We're not sure quite when we leave yet, but it's soon. Very soon.

Thanks for all your prayers :)

New pics up on Flickr.

Words From the Dark

To all those who still check this blog, thank you. It's been a rough few weeks for me, mostly because of the amount of work I've been doing for various churches and applications. But also because, last week, my HP Tablet Laptop died on me, in a manner of speaking. I say it that way because, technically, it still works, but barely. I couldn't turn it on for hours every morning, and by the time it worked, it worked so slowly that it made getting anything done very worrisome - I never knew if it would shut off on me and lose my data.

So after much thought and research, I decided that it was time for a change. I went up to the apple store and did not buy anything - they were out of the laptop I wanted. So instead I ordered it through the website: my new 13" macbook pro.

Relax.

I know I've never been much of an advocate for Apple products, but they've grown on me as they've added to the features and their quality has become better and better. For instance, my new laptop has a keyboard that lights up when a little sensor tells it that the room is too dark. I can now see my keyboard when I'm anywhere, anytime, and that makes me very happy. It also has a possible 7-hour battery life, assuming that I've got the LED-backlit screen as low as it'll go. But even if it's about half-way between low and high, it lasts around 5-ish hours if I'm careful, and this also makes me happy. With the 2.53 ghz dual-core processor and 4gb ram, it's very fast for the 4.5 lbs it weighs.

It also runs Windows, which means I didn't lose any of my programs. It seems to run windows faster than my previous laptop, which was a bit of a surprise, but not bad. So I've been using Vista Ultimate, trying to adjust myself to the multi-touch trackpad with no buttons, and generally getting a lot more done than I did before. I'll also be dabbling with Garage Band and Keynote at some point in the future when I'm able to get the DVD for iWork out from our storage area.

All in all, it's been a weird change, but a really good one. I still like Dell, but sadly the laptops I looked at there didn't quite compare with their options. Those that had lit-keyboards and the power-saving LED screens were also the same ones that had reviews worrying about how hot they run - the same issue I had with my HP. While the apple was a bit expensive, I'm hoping it'll last longer than the 3-year warranty that it came with.

Odds are good, I'm told.

Facedown: Final Version

Here's what I'm calling my "final" arrangement of Matt Redman's "Facedown". It's not actually a ton different from the last one, although I did mess around with a few suggestions from people (more reverb on the sax, pulling the guitar arpeggio out of the first chorus a bit, etc.). Anyway, hope you enjoy it.

Now onto my next project, something I actually wrote this time. Guess we'll see how it goes!

Facedown [UPDATED]

So my good friend Dan pointed out a way in which I could post an mp3 here on my blog. I've completed the audio demo that I've been working on. It's a song by Matt Redman called "Facedown." Enjoy!

Welcomed in to the courts of the King
I've been ushered into your presence
Lord I stand on your merciful ground
Yet with every step tread with reverence

And I'll fall facedown
As your glory shines around
Yes I'll fall facedown
As your glory shines around

Who is there in the heavens like you
And upon the earth who's your equal
You are far above you're the highest of heights
We are bowing down to exalt you

And I'll fall facedown ...

So let your glory shine around!
Let your glory shine around!
King of glory here be found!
King of glory!

Please, Talk to Your Kids

The Story Continues

For those of you following our little story, there's not a whole lot more to report. I've continued working on (and am in the final phase of) recording and editing a new audio demo that I really hope will wow all the churches to whom I apply. On a totally random note, if you know a way to put such recordings up on a blog (without putting them in a video), let me know, I'd love to post the recording here to get your opinion.

We're currently in Canandaigua, and going back and forth between Crosswinds Church and Little Lakes Church, as Crosswinds has been home for a long time, and Little Lakes has given us a stream of opportunities to lead worship and keep on top of our skills. We've met some wonderful new people and been reunited with some old friends, which has been nice. The search for a job, however, continues in earnest, and we'd appreciate your continued prayers in that direction. Maybe you might also mention to Him that I'd love to be writing again, if only I could work up the words.

On that note, however, I have some fun stuff too: pictures. It seems in lieu of writing, these days, I've been overly inspired in the arts of recording and photography. I've just put two new sets up on flickr, here and here. But this is my favorite shot, from my sister's party celebrating her graduation from RIT this past weekend. Enjoy.

Another Question

I've been having a rough time of it lately, both for writing and with the job search. For those that haven't heard, we're moving back to NY until we get said elusive job.  So in lieu of the writing that I can't seem to get myself to do, let me ask you all a question:

What, in your perspective, does the ideal "local church" look like?

Project

Sorry for the silence of late. I've had writers block on the next post in the "Music and Mission" series (it needs to be just right). More importantly, I've started a new blog in the hopes that it'll get my brain juices going to write a book I've been working on - in my head - for a while.

You may be wondering about the URL - "enter the numenous." Rudolf Otto once wrote a book called The Idea of the Holy, a book that has inspired me to this day. I find that Otto did a phenomenal job of putting into words the fact that God is a beautiful mystery. To talk about this, he had to make up a few new words. God's holiness is partly known, and partially mysterious to us, almost unknowable. It was this mystery that he called the numenous.

The journey of the Christian Agnostic is one of diving headfirst into a life of mystery, of danger, and of uncertainty. We entrust ourselves to God by suspending disbelief and allowing Him to work in our lives, to reveal Himself to us through our investigation and through our experiences. To enter the numenous is not safe, but it is good.

I encourage you to take a look, comment, and contribute in any way you think will be constructive.

Thanks in advance.

Update

Just a quick update, for those of you waiting with baited breath (weirdest phrase ever, by the way) for the next post in my series on music and mission. I've been in the process of re-vamping my entire laptop because HP programs were slowing it down ... a lot. You might say I gave it a personality transplant; I obtained Vista Ultimate from a friend and have since been installing it and formatting hard drives and installing drivers and all that. But in the process, I may have lost the text file I'd saved for all of the work on this series. So it may be a few days before I'm back up and running again, but at least the lappy is working faster.

Missionary Networking

One of the ideas that has been increasingly fascinating to me of late is the idea of the "network." Basically, a hierarchy, is like this:

CEO -> SVP -> VP -> Peons

It's centralized at the CEO, who makes the decisions and communicates them via peons to the SVP, and so on.  Instead, a network has no leader, no "center." It is "decentralized," and yet for some reason, it works. Think of a flock of birds, who for no apparent reason all decide to change direction mid-flight - all at once. Or a school of fish. Or a protest rally. Or a protest rally that turns ugly. Or Al Qaeda. Human nature is more complicated than was previously thought; we don't need to have a solid leader to do things together, it seems, but rather we need some sort of idea that can be easily "sneezed" from one person to another, a guiding principle that motivates action. Sometimes, we will even do things in groups that we wouldn't do otherwise; we get caught up in the moment, a sort of "collective-consciousness" that nobody can quite explain.

It's amazing.

Obviously there are plenty of negative applications, but what about positives? The internet is a good example, one that has been used for both. Similarly, over time, the church has been just such a "decentralized" structure; no matter how many denominations pop up with a CEO-style visionary at the top, there are always enough others that make up for the deficiencies of the others. When one denomination suffers a major setback - say, one of its leaders gets frisky where he or she shouldn't - there are always others to pick up the slack. It's like having a spider-web; even if one node in the web breaks, the rest still hold it mostly together. Sure, they miss the one, and the web doesn't look quite as nice, but it still works.

What if this idea could be harnessed for beneficial means?

I was talking with a missionary friend the other day, and he was telling me about the environment he's working in. It's a hard place he's working in; high rate of unemployment, lots of poverty, and a culture quite at odds with the larger culture that surrounds it. And he's struggling just a bit, trying to figure out not only how the culture works and thinks, but what he can do as a missionary to help improve things in a way honoring the people and their heritage.

And it occurred to me, I know a few people who might have something to say for him, but just happen to be involved in missions in cultures around the globe. And then I thought, surely there must be other missionaries who I don't know that could help him, or at least give him some good principled advice that he could apply to his situation, stories of "well this is what WE did ...".

And then I thought, hey, this is that networking stuff.

The more I thought about it - in the shower, at my desk, during sermons at church (sorry Mike), before I fell asleep - the more I thought "this could work, we just need a place to start it." I've talked to a few friends, professors, and the like, and they all agree - a place for missional networking is desperately needed. Missionaries have so many stories that have good, practical solutions for everyday problems, stories that can help other missionaries in other cultures with solving the everyday problems a mission agency or a sending church is not equipped to think through.

We've had a few ideas; but I would love to hear yours, especially if you are a missionary. We talked through the idea of using a centralized office, but that was too impractical in this time of financial crunch. We talked through the possibility of each seminary having a small office and networking - this is, I think, the best option, but sadly a ways off. We talked about web forums and a database ... but it seems like too little, especially for missionaries in places without web access.

So that's where we are. I want to open it up, ask for some creative help.

Who out there has a good idea?

Milestone

I just happened to notice that my blog had 499 posts ... before this one. It's been five years of randomness, and this is post number 500! Not only that, but my little tracker-gizmo says I've had over 20,000 hits to the site since year number two (when I discovered the tracker-gizmo). That is a lot of people with very little time on their hands, but thank you to each of you for taking the time to read at least a little of my rambling.

So where do I find myself? Still job-hunting, of course, but feeling like an end may be in sight. I don't know what that end might look like, though.

I gave up, temporarily, the recording I was working on for "Prophesy" to try working on something a bit easier for my first time; it turns out that recording vocals is extremely difficult, and I picked the hardest song I'd written to try first. Figures, right? So I started a few "test-projects" to experiment, giving the vocals to a more ... experienced singer (my wife) so I can focus on the intricacies of recording without wondering why I sound like ... that.

Anyway, thank you to all of you who've read this long; I promise, I'm trying to think of some new topics to write on. Perhaps suggestions are in order from you, the readers? Just leave them in the comments section.

[The Management]

Post-Apocalyptic Preparation

Sorry for the silence of late; I've been visiting family.

Are Violent Video Games Adequately Preparing Children For The Apocalypse?

A Prayer Request

Please be praying for Australians living in Victoria. As you no doubt have heard by now, the state is in the midst of the worst natural disaster in its history. While bushfires rage every year, this year has been particularly harsh, as the heat has gotten intense (46.6 C, roughly 116 F), destroying millions of dollars in homes, and claiming 93 lives ... so far. To my Australian brothers and sisters, you are in our prayers.

UPDATE: Mark Sayers has more to say on this tragedy from Doncaster, one of Melbourne's eastern suburbs.

Have Purgatory, Will Travel

Just thought I'd post a quick update about what's going on for us right now., for those interested in such things It's, sadly, a very quick update because in spite of the time available to me to write about what we've been doing, there's very little of substance on which to report.

My life, of late, has revolved around several things, first and foremost of which is applying for jobs. No, I do not have one yet, despite my best efforts. I've applied locally for anything I could think of, and nationally for worship pastor, young-adult pastor, and missions pastor positions at churches (my training qualifies me for all three). Nothing yet, though one or two prospects on the horizon.

This has left me with more time on my hands than I had anticipated, but for some reason, writing has taken a back-seat. I don't know if it's just worrying about my financial and professional futures that has wounded my passion for writing, but I'm thinking that if it plays a part, it's only a part. The other big part of my time lately has been recording, which has likely sapped my writing creativity for its own purposes. My grandparents gave me a cool little gizmo for Christmas that allows me to plug any instrument into my computer via a nifty silver box with dials on it. The other grandparents gave me a microphone and stand, so the possibilities are limited only to what I can play. But then, my wife suggested that I upgrade my Finale notation software so that I can use their sampling technology to write and record music without knowing how to play the instruments (case in point, drums and oboe; I can't play those, but Finale can if I write a part for them).

Together, the three give me pretty much an unlimited vocabulary of recording possibilities, which is pretty cool, since I've only ever recorded one song and that was before my wedding five years ago. For my first project, I decided that I should record a piece I wrote in college that tells the story of John the Baptist. I'm not sure why I wrote the piece in the first place, but suffice it to say, it's probably my best in terms of poetry and interesting sounds. And then my roommate Mike helped write a cool guitar part.

So I've been playing the same song now for two weeks, and it's slowly coming together. I think I'm nearly done with the guitar parts, and the drumset part sounds decent. Now I'm working on an oboe part for it in Finale and maybe some strings. And then vocals. I've never done this before, so it's sort of an exercise in trial-and-error, and lots of frustration with "but why did it do that?!" But it's starting to sound better. Actually, it's pretty sweet, if I say so myself.

But it hasn't kept my mind off of our situation. If you're the praying sort, I'd love it if you'd mention us to God at some point soon. He's been good to us, and hasn't let us down yet, and I keep reminding myself of this, but I'm not going to lie, it's hard. Thanks to those of you that have been praying for us.

And now, the lyrics. Enjoy.

There's a voice in the desert calling out to the wind
Dressed in robes of burlap, telling of the end
of the sin of man in the Father's eyes
He who has ears to hear, then let him hear
Prophesy ...

Water from the Jordan into fire from the Lord
Saved by the mercy of the One who is to come
For the least of the Kingdom is even greater than He
For a dove will be a sign, make straight the way
Prophesy ...

Prepare ye the way, prepare ye the way

Cast aside to prison in a foreign land
Sent to live and die for the Son of Man
Blessed is the one who doesn't fall away
on account of the Son, who is the Lamb
Prophesy ...

Feeling Sick

Well, I've been out of commission for a little while, first with a sinus infection, then with a stomach flu (from which I'm still recovering). In lieu of higher thought, here are some amusing articles from The Onion you may enjoy. A new software will age your photos, the NSF has discovered that science is hard, and CalTech physicists successfully split a bill. Also, I heartily recommend The Onion's Our Dumb World, the only atlas you'll ever need.

Also, it's been a little while since I pointed you all in the direction of the pictures, so there may be a few new ones up there you haven't seen. Like this one:

Finito

My apologies for the silence - I've been very busy, being sick, graduating, writing final papers, graduating ... did I mention I graduated?

Michael Crichton Dies at 66

R.I.P. Michael Crichton - we'll miss your singular talent and creativity.

Christian Agnosticism Series

I really wanted to put all of the links to my "Christian Agnostic" series onto one page for convenience. I've actually been thinking about turning it into a longer piece, maybe a book or something, since a friend of mine mentioned he'd like to hear more on the subject. It's been a dream for a while, to write a book, but so far I haven't had the time, with school and all. In any case, here they are, all six links (Part I had really nothing to do with the rest of it). I'd love to hear thoughts on these again, especially in light of the book project.

Christian Agnostic, Part II: Verb
Christian Agnostic, Part III: Scripture
Christian Agnostic, Part IV: Science and the Bible
Christian Agnostic, Part V: Forward
Christian Agnostic, Part VI: Doubt
Christian Agnostic, Part VII: Disciple