December 6, 2004

On Reheating Chicken

I have just discovered why one should not eat chicken alone.

As it turns out, chicken, when cooked whole (stuffed, of course) is really tasty. This is not why you should not eat chicken alone. Nor is my next comment. It is almost as good reheated (assuming you do it right) as it was when you first made it.

I didn't do it right. That's one reason you shouldn't eat chicken alone - at least, assuming you are male - because you are a guy, and you can't cook to save your life, nor can you reconstitute food into its pre-refridgerated form without serious self-injury.

Ok, so I burnt my tongue. Stuff it.

Anyway, I figured this would be the best time to say yes, guys, love your wives with everything you've got. Because you never know when they'll have to stay at work until late in the evening and say "oh, honey, just reheat some leftovers" and assume you'll be fine.

You won't.

I've just had an experience with this. See, as I see it, guys really DO need women. If this wasn't the case, we wouldn't do things like burn our tongue on overheated mashed potatoes, we wouldn't put the gravy in with everything else to heat up (as it turns out, everything else takes less time to heat up than gravy does), and we wouldn't eat the chicken with our fingers.

If my wife had been here, I would've eaten with a fork and knife and the food would've tasted almost like it did when she made it two days ago. But alas, my wife had to stay late for work today. But ya know, I think it's a good reminder of how entirely helpless I am by myself. I SAY that I'd be fine, that I can take care of myself, but who am I to judge such things?

Perhaps this was God's way of telling guys how much we need Him. I mean, we call Him "father" all the time, but that's just another way of saying "parent." We're entirely helpless without our parents when we're children. Heck, the Bible's always calling us "children of God." I'd say that's not just one of those cute little phrases, but that it's got WAY more implied in it than you might think. As a child of God, I'm entirely dependent upon God for everything: life, liberty, happiness, and especially properly reconstituted leftovers. How else would I eat? It's by the grace of God alone that I managed to stomach what I created!

All that said, I'm still hungry and I'm going to pray harder next time - and I'll do it before I reheat the leftovers.

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